Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Datus Hiatus

It's been a week since I started my datus hiatus and I already feel better. The pressure to mitigate the rat's nest of my emotions is gone. The need to make decisions about so-so men (he's nice but....) on the fly absent. The constant bar scanning while out with my friends has been replaced with actual listening sessions. And naturally my free time has increased exponentially. I think men had accounted for 95% of my brain's clutter. Now my mind has time to think about more important issues such as work projects, SF's summer concert schedule, and finding a fashionable triathalon suit. (no small feat). Thinking about chocolate, oddly, has also started to occupy more of my mind.

I did indeed meet up with the herbalist/poker dealer/snowboarder /life coach (the last attribute was discovered in our 'meet-up') but in the spirit of hiatus I decided to play the "let's be friends" card. After all, engaging conversations and shared hobbies (um snowboarding, not herbs) don't have to lead up to a whirlwind romance. It seemed to work...after my "friendship" bomb was dropped, he still wanted to do social activities together...as pals. But much to my dismay, my male audience scoffed at this development.

Women always seem to want men as friends (less drama, more adventure)....but do men in their 30s really want to seek out new feminine buddies? My good male friend CB explained it to me this way. "If friendships grow gradually over time (usually with friends in common), sure. But any guy that wants to leap into a new friendship with a hot chick is only trying to sleep with her. He'll play the nice friend card for a while but is hoping that she'll change her mind after a few too many dirty martinis....."

Remind my to lay off the olive juice while out with my male compadres.

Sigh. Why can't we all go back to college where everyone was friends first? Back in the university days I had more male counterparts than females. Oh the fun weekends spent rock climbing and guitar playing in platonic bliss!! Of course in those days I also wore birkenstocks and thought chapstick was makeup. Hmmmm...Well, no matter. I am determined to remain platonic while in Jimmy Choos and a fresh blow out. Hopefully my datus hiatus spirit will take over the city and we'll all revert back to college like attitudes..minus the birkenstocks.

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